Employee Evaluation Name: ________________________ Date: __________________

Position: ___________________

• Knowledge: [ ] The Son of a Bitch Really Knows His Shit! [ ] Knows Just Enough To Be Dangerous. [ ] Only Has Half a Brain and is Dangerous. [ ] Fucking Brain Damaged, His Coffee Cup Has a Higher IQ. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Accuracy: [ ] Does Excellent Work If Not Pre-occupied With Pussy. [ ] Pretty Good; Only Occasionally Blows it Out His Ass. [ ] Has to Take His Shoes Off To Count Higher Than Ten. [ ] Couldn't Count His Balls And Get The Same Number Twice. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Attitude: [ ] Extremely Cooperative (If You Kiss His Ass Daily). [ ] Brown Noser In Good Standing. [ ] Often Pisses Off Co-Workers, Thinks He Owns the Damn Place [ ] Doesn't Give A Shit, Never Did, Never Will. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Reliability: [ ] Really A Dependable CockSucker. [ ] Works So Hard That He Has To Take An Extra Day Off Each Week. [ ] Can Rely On Him To Be The First One Out The Door. [ ] Totally Fucking Worthless. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Appearance: [ ] Extremely Neat, Even Combs His Pubic Hair. [ ] Looks Great On His Days Off. [ ] Dirty, Filthy, Smelly Son Of a Bitch. [ ] Flies Leave Fresh Dog Shit To Follow Him. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Performance: [ ] Goes Like A Son Of A Bitch...If There's Money In It For Him. [ ] Does All Kinds of Good Shit At Evaluation Time. [ ] Works Well After An Enema. [ ] Couldn't Do Less If He Were In A Coma. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Leadership: [ ] Carries A Chain saw And Gets Good Results. [ ] Macho Attitude, Commands Total Disgust. [ ] Dog Fasted For Three Day Last Time He Brought Home Pork Chops. [ ] Mother Teresa Told Him to Get Fucked.

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  I UNDERSTAND THAT I HAVE BEEN COUNSELED AND UNDERSTAND MY RIGHTS UNDER THE PRIVACY ACT OF 1974. I FURTHER ACKNOWLEDGE THAT I AM FUCKED UP AND WORTHLESS AS A FOOTBALL BAT, AND I WILL MAKE SOME KIND OF ATTEMPT TO CORRECT MY OBVIOUS DEFICIENCES.

_______________________________ Employee Signature (If He Can Write)