A1:  You can only get three fingers in a bowling ball.
     A2:  You can't fit the blonde in the bowling ball.
     A3:  There is no difference. They're both round and have
          three holes to poke.
     A4:  You don't eat your bowling ball
 102. Q:   What do a bowling ball and a blonde have in common?
     A:   Chances are they'll both end up in the gutter.
 103. Q:   What is the difference between a blonde and "The Titanic"?
     A:   They know how many men went down on "The Titanic".
 104. Q:   What is the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?
     A:   Bigfoot has been spotted.
 105. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a telephone?
     A:   It costs 30 cents to use a telephone.
 106. Q:   What's the difference between a blonde and a guy?
     A:   The blonde has the higher sperm count.
 107. Q:   What is the difference between a blonde and the Grand Old Duke of
          York?
     A:   The Grand Old Duke of York only 'had' 10000 men.
 108. Q:   Why is a washing machine better than a blonde?
     A:   Because you can drop your load in a washing machine, and it
          won't follow you around for a week.
 109. Q:   What do blondes and cow-pats have in common?
     A:   They both get easier to pick-up with age.
 110. Q:   What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?
     A:   The more you bang it, the looser it gets.
 111. Q:   What does a blonde and a beer bottle have in common?
     A:   They're both empty from the neck up.
 112. Q:   What do blondes and spaghetti have in common?
     A:   They both wriggle when you eat them.
113. Q:   Why did the deaf blonde sit on a newspaper?
     A:   So she could lip read.
 114. Q:   What do peroxide blondes and black men have in common?
     A:   They both have black roots.
 115. Q:   What do you call a blonde with a bag of sugar on her head?
     A:   Sweet Fuck All...
 116. Q:   How do you drown a blonde?
     A1:  Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool.
     A2:  Don't tell her to swallow.
     A3:  Leave a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.
 117. Q:   Why did the blonde drown in the pool?
     A:   Someone left a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.
 118. Q:   Why do blondes have square boobs?
     A:   Because they forgot to take the tissues out of the box.
 119. Q:   How many blondes does it take to make chocolate-chip cookies?
     A1:  10. One to mix the dough and nine to peel the smarties.
     A2:  Three...one to mix the batter and two to squeeze the rabbit.

A3: Two...one to make batter and one to peel the M&Ms. 120. Q: How do you tell if a blonde did your landscaping?

1. The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard.
2. Q: What did the blonde's mom say to her before the blonde's date?
3. If you're not in bed by 12, come home.
4. Q: What's the blonde's cheer?
5. " I'm blonde, I'm blonde, I'm B.L.O.N....ah, oh well.. I'm blonde, I'm blonde, yea yea yea..."
6. Q: What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts?
7. Change.
8. Q: How does a blonde moonwalk?
9. She pulls down her panties and slides her ass along the floor!
10. Q: Why do blondes find it difficult to marry?
11. Because you don't have to marry them for sex!
12. Q: What do you get when you cross a blonde and a gorilla?
13. Who knows, there is only so much a gorilla can be forced to do.
14. Q: Why does a blonde only change her baby's diapers every month?
15. Because it says right on it "good for up to 20 pounds."
16. Q: How did the blonde try to kill the bird?
17. She threw it off a cliff.
18. Q: How does a blonde kill a fish?
19. She drowns it.
20. Q: Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw

    puzzle in only 6 months?

21. Because on the box it said From 2-4 years.
22. Q: What do you say to a blonde with no arms and no legs?
23. "Nice tits!"
24. Q: How does a blonde high-5?
25. She smacks herself in the forehead.
26. Q: How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
27. Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.
28. Q: Why aren't there many blonde gymnasts?
29. Because when they do the splits, they stick to the floor.
30. Q: Why do blondes have legs?

    A1: So they don't get stuck to the ground. A2: To get between the bedroom and the kitchen. A3: So they don't leave trails, like little snails.

31. Q: Why did the blonde go half way to Norway and then turn around

    and come home?

32. It took her that long to discover that a 14-inch Viking was a television.
33. Q: What is the irritating part around a blonde's vagina?

    A1: The blonde! A2: The other guys waiting their turn.

34. Q: How do you describe a blonde, surrounded by drooling idiots?
35. Flattered.
36. Q: Why do blondes always die before help arrives?
37. They always forget the "11" in "9-1-1".
38. Q: What did the blonde say when asked if she'd ever been picked

    up by "the fuzz"?

39. "No. But I've been swung around by the tits."
40. Q: What do you call a swimming pool full of blondes?
41. Frosted Flakes.
42. Q: What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer?
43. Frosted Flakes.
44. Q: How does a blonde interpret 6.9?
45. A 69 interrupted by a period.
46. Q: What's the difference between a blonde having her period and

    a terrorist?

47. You can negotiate with a terrorist.
48. Q: What did the blonde say when she looked into a box of Cheerios?
49. "Oh look! Donut seeds!"
50. Q: Why do blondes have two more brain cells than a cow?

    A1: So they don't shit everywhere when you pull their tits. A2: So that when you pull their tits, they don't moo.

51. Q: Why don't blondes breast feed?
52. Because they always burn their nipples.
53. Q: Did you hear about the blonde lesbian?
54. She kept having affairs with men!
55. Q: Why do blondes put their hair in ponytails?
56. To cover up the valve stem.
57. Q: What did the blonde name her pet zebra?
58. Spot.
59. Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?
60. A Space Invader.
61. Q: What's a blondes' favourite rock group?
62. Air Supply.
63. Q: What do you see when you look into a blonde's eyes?
64. The back of her head.
65. Q: Why do blondes drive VW's?
66. Because they can't spell PORSCHE!
67. Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday mornings?
68. Tell them a joke on Friday night!
69. Q: Why did God create blondes?
70. Because sheep can't bring beer from the fridge.
71. Why did God create brunettes?
72. Neither could the blondes.
73. Q: What do you call a blonde in a tree with a brief case?
74. Branch Manager. 158. Q: How did the dumb blonde break her leg raking leaves?
75. She fell out of the tree.
76. Q: Why do blondes have see-through lunch box lids?

    A1: So they know if it is morning or afternoon. A2: So that when they're on the train they can tell

    if they're going to work or coming home.

77. Q: Whats black and fuzzy and hangs from the ceiling?
78. A blonde electrician.
79. Q: Why are dumb blonde jokes so short?

    A1: So brunettes can remember them. A2: Because blondes are so SHALLOW a long joke wouldn't fit. A3: So men can understand them.

80. Q: Why wasn't the Virgin Mary a blonde?
81. She wouldn't have been old enough to bear children!
82. Q: What do you call a smart blonde?

    A1: A golden retriever. A2: A labrador. A3: An indicator of a really bad hangover.

83. Q: Why are blondes hurt by people's words?
84. Because people keep hitting them with dictionaries.
85. Q: Why do blondes have periods?
86. They deserve them.
87. Q: Why did the blonde fail at being a prostitute?
88. Because she gave blow-jobs literally.
89. Q: Why did the blonde smile when she walked the marriage aisle?
90. She realized she gave her last blowjob.
91. Q: What did the blonde do when she got her period?
92. Looked around for the bastard that must have shot her?
93. Q: Why did they call the blonde "twinkie"?
94. She liked to be filled with cream.
95. Q: What did the blonde say to the physicist?
96. "Why, I just _love_ nuclear fission! What do you use for bait?"
97. Q: Why are blondes like cornflakes?
98. Because they're simple, easy and they taste good.
99. Q: How does a blonde hold her liquor?
100. By the ears.
101. Q: How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?
102. You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.
103. Q: How do you drive a blonde crazy?
104. Give her a bag of M&Ms and tell her to alphabetise them.
105. Q: What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory?
106. Proofreading.
107. Q: Do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&M factory?
108. For throwing out the W's.
109. Q: Why did the blonde try to steal a police car?
110. She saw "911" and thought it was a Porsche.
111. Q: What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?
112. Last year's hide and seek champ.
113. Q: How do you get a blonde pregnant?
114. Come in her shoes and let the flies do the rest.
115. Q: What's the difference between a blonde track team and a tribe of sly

     pygmies?

116. One's a bunch a cunning runts. 181. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and the Suez/Panama Canal?
117. One's a busy ditch.
118. Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a toilet?
119. A toilet won't follow you around after you use it.
120. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a rooster?
121. In the morning a rooster says, "Cock'll-doodl-doooo", while a blonde says, "Any-cock'll-doooo."
122. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley?
123. The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own.
124. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and your job?
125. Your job still sucks after 6 months.
126. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a trampoline?
127. You take off your shoes before using a trampoline.
128. Q: What's the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac,

     and a blonde?

129. The prostitute says, "Aren't you done yet?" The nympho says, "Are you done already?" The blonde says, "Beige...I think I'll paint the ceiling beige."
130. Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you?
131. Tell her she's pregnant.
132. What will she ask you?
133. "Is it mine?"
134. Q: What do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel?
135. An air bag.
136. Q: Why are there lip stick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde

     drives a car?

137. Cause she blows the horn!
138. Q: What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is on?
139. It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off. It's on. It's off.
140. Q: Why did the blonde drive into the ditch?
141. To turn the blinker off. 193. Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH?
142. A blonde going through a flashing red light.
143. Q: What is happening when you hear varoom...screech, varoom...screech,

     varoom...screech.....?

144. A blonde trying to drive through an intersection with a flashing red light.
145. Q: Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach?
146. So her male would get delivered to the right box.
147. Q: Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death

     in their car at a drive-in movie theater?

148. They went to see "Closed for the Winter".
149. Q: How can you tell when a blonde is dating?
150. By the buckle print on her forehead.
151. Q: How can you tell who is a blonde's boyfriend?
152. He's the one with the belt buckle the matches the impression in her forehead.
153. Q: What is the blonde's chronic speech impediment?
154. She can't say "No".
155. Q: What did they name the offspring of a blonde and a Puerto Rican?
156. Retardo.