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This blonde and her boyfriend were sitting in a hot tub when the blonde said to her boyfriend, "Is it true that if you pull your finger out, I'll sink?"
A blonde walked into a hardware store, picked up the hinges she was looking for, and went to go pay for them. The clerk asked her, "Need a screw for Did you hear about the blonde mom who kept an icepack on her chest to keep the milk fresh?
A government study has shown that blondes do have more fun - they just don't remember who with.
Did you hear about the blonde bride that was so horny she carried a bouquet of batteries?
A blonde goes into a bar. The bartender asks her what she would like, and she replies, "Bring me a beer." The bartender then asks, "Anheuser-Busch?" To which she replies, "Fine thanks, and how's your cock?"
Last night I went home to my blonde girlfriend, and told her I was going to screw her brains out.
Then I realized I was too late.
A blonde and a brunette were talking one day. The brunette said that her boyfriend had a slight dandruff problem but she gave him "Head and Shoulders" and it cleared it up. The blonde asked inquisitively, "How do you give shoulders?"
How is a blonde like a.......
Hairdryer? Turn her on and she starts to blow. Vaccum Cleaner? Turn her on and she starts to suck. Light Switch? Even a six year old can turn her on.
Did you hear what the blonde who was opening a new bar said when her lawyer explained to her that she needed a liquor license? "Oh, it's not gonna be THAT kind of a bar. That's disgusting!"
Blonde Medical Terminology
Anally -- occurring yearly
Artery -- study of paintings
Bacteria -- back door of cafeteria
Barium -- what doctors do when treatment fails Benign -- what you be after you be eight Bowel -- letter like A.E.I.O.U
Caesarian section -- district in Rome
Cat scan -- searching for kitty
Cauterize -- Made eye contact with her
Colic -- sheep dog
Coma -- a punctuation mark
Congenital -- friendly
D&C -- where Washington is
Diarrhea -- journal of daily events
Dilate -- to live long
Enema -- not a friend
Fester -- quicker
Fibula -- a small lie
Genital -- non-Jewish
G.I. Series -- soldiers' ball game
Grippe -- suitcase
Hangnail -- coathook
Impotent -- distinguished, well known
Intense pain -- torture in a teepee
Labour pain -- got hurt at work
Medical staff -- doctor's cane
Morbid -- higher offer
Nitrate -- cheaper than day rate
Node -- was aware of
Outpatient -- person who had fainted
Pap smear -- fatherhood test
Pelvis -- cousin of Elvis
Post operative -- letter carrier
Protein -- favouring young people
Rectum -- damn near killed 'em
Recovery room -- place to do upholstery Rheumatic -- amorous
Scar -- rolled tobacco leaf
Secretion -- hiding anything
Seizure -- Roman emperor
Serology -- study of knighthood
Tablet -- small tablet
Terminal illness -- sickness at airport Tibia -- country in North Africa
Tumour -- an extra pair
Urine -- opposite of you're out
Varicose -- located nearby
Vein -- conceited
Revenge of the Blonds The only problem with women is men. Women prefer the simple things in life...like men. Boy will be boys but one day all girls will be women. Every man has it in his power to make one woman happy...by remaining a bachelor. Most men prefer looks to brains, because most men see better than they think. I only wanted to have a child, not marry one. The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing and then marry him. What's the difference between men and pigs?...Pigs don't turn into men when they drink. The average man is proof enough that women can take a joke. Boys will be boys, but men are better at it. What do you call a man who has lost 98% of his brain?...A widower. They put one man on the moon. Why can't they put them all there? What's an orgasm Mom? I don't know...ask your father. If you catch a man...throw him back. Men call us birds, is that because of all the worms we pick up? What is the useless bit of skin attached to a penis?...A man
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