I did not do it in a car
                        I did not do it in a bar
                        I did not do it in the dark
                        I did not do it in the park
                        I did not do it on a date
                        I did not ever fornicate
                        I did not do it at a dance
                        I did not do it in her pants
                        I did not get beyond first base
                        I did not do it in her face
                        I never did it in a bed
                        If you think that, you've been misled
                        I did not do it with a groan
                        I did not do it on the phone
                        I did not cause her dress to stain
                        I never boinked Saddam Hussein
                        I did not do it with a whip
                        I never fondled Linda Tripp
                        I never acted really silly
                        With volunteers like Kathleen Willey
                        There was one time, with Margaret Thatcher
                        I chased her 'round,
                        but could not catch her
                        No kinky stuff, not on your life
                        I wouldn't, even with my wife
                        And Gennifer Flowers' tale of woes
                        Was paid for by my right-wing foes
                        And Paula Jones, and those State Troopers
                        Are just a bunch of party poopers
                        I did not ask my friends to lie
                        I did not hang them out to dry
                        I did not do it last November
                        But if I did, I don't remember
                        I did not do it in the hall
                        I could have, but I don't recall
                        I never did it in my study
                        I never did it with my dog, Buddy
                        I never did it to Sox, the cat
                        I might have-once-with Arafat
                        I never did it in a hurry
                        I never groped Ms. Betty Currie
                        There was no sex at Arlington
                        There was no sex on Air Force One
                       I might have copped a little feel
                        And then endeavored to conceal
                        But never did these things so lewd
                        At least, not ever in the nude
                        These things to which I have confessed
                        They do not count, if we stayed dressed
                        It never happened with cigar
                        I never dated Mrs. Starr
                        I did not know this little sin
                        Would be retold on CNN
                        I broke some rules my Mama taught me
                        I tried to hide, but now you've caught me
                        But I implore, I do beseech
                        Do not condemn, do not impeach
                        I might have got a little tail
                        But never, never did inhale.