A flashy showgirl married a 97 year old retired well-to-do general, largely in the belief that the old codger would never survive the wedding night. While her new husband was in the bathroom, the woman slipped into a black see-through nightgown and struck her most seductive pose on the bed. When the old man finally emerged, she was startled to see that he was stark naked except for earplugs, a peg on his nose and a condom. "Why are you wearing those?" she asked in amazement. "Because if there's anything I just can't stand, " he grumbled, "it's the sound of a woman screaming and the smell of burning rubber"


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