WAYS A CHURCH CHOIR DIRECTOR TELLS SOMEONE THEY
CAN'T SING

* "I'm sorry, we've run out of robes."

* "We need strong singers like you in the congregation to help them sing the hymns."

* "I wouldn't want you to strain your voice."

* "Did you know singing can aggravate sinus problems?"

* "We still need good people for the handbell choir."

* "Here's a book on spiritual gifts, why don't you look through it and we can find another place in the church for you to effectively minister."

* "It's a shame composers don't write more songs in your style."

* "You have a unique range - you hit both notes well."

* "Did you know there is a new Bible study starting the same night as choir practice, I think you'd get a lot from it."

* "You have excellent posture."