REASONS FOR BEING AUSTRALIAN

- Knowing your great-grand-dad was a murdering bastard no civilized nation on earth wanted.

- Fosters Lager.

- Dispossess Abbos who have lived in your country for 40,000 years because you think it belongs to you.

- Annihilate England every time you play them at cricket.

- Tact and sensitivity.

- Bondi Beach.

- Other beaches.

- The weather.

- Drinking cold lager on the beach.

- Having a bit of a swim and then drinking some cold lager on the beach.