WORST CHRISTMAS GIFTS

1. The gift of a free membership to weight watchers.

2. The "Monica gift set including a cigar, beret, and stain remover.

3. A ride-on vacuum cleaner - especially when she is expecting her favorite perfume.

4. A free consultation with Dr. Kevorkian.

5. A Solar powered flashlight.

6. A voucher for a free pap smear.

7. A ten dollar gift certificate to McDonalds.

8. Membership in Fruitcake of the month club.

9. The same lousy present that they gave you last year that you never opened and didn't know how to get rid of it.

10. A guide to marital happiness from your spouse.