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I heard the big owner on the radio with ways to talk about humans and still be politically correct. Well, here's: "HOW TO TALK ABOUT CATS & STILL BE POLITICALLY CORRECT." I'm not aloof. I am Hominoidally Unimpressed. I don't shed. I develop Follicle Abdication. I don't scratch. I cause temporary hemoglobin displacement. I don't purr. I am aurally appreciative. I am not indifferent. I am Dispassionately Neutral. I'm not small. I am Corpus Compactus. I am not fat. I have a Distended Cat Food Storage Facility. I am not asleep. I am temporarily inert. I don't chase mice. I am Rodent Defiant. I am not fussy. I become a Fastidious Feline. I am not hungry. I suffer from Craving Derangement Disorder. I'm not fixed. I am Romantically Inaccessible. The Big Owner isn't dumb. He is a Speed Bump on the Information Superhighway.
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